Tempurature is Reaticve

TEMPERATURE is all RELATIVE
(think in Farenheit)
60 above zero:
Floridians and Hawaiians turn on the heat.
People in Manitoba plant gardens.

50 above zero:
Californians and Hawaiians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Manitoba sunbathe.

40 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Manitoba drive with the windows down.

32 above zero:
Distilled water freezes.
The water in Manitoba gets thicker.

20 above zero:
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Manitoba throw on a flannel shirt.

15 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Manitoba have the last cookout before it gets cold.

Zero:
People in Miami all die.
People in Manitoba close the windows.

10 below zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico or Hawaii
People in Manitoba get out their winter coats.

25 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Guides in Manitoba are selling cookies door to door.

40 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Manitoba let the dogs sleep indoors.

100 below zero:
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Manitobans get upset because they can't start the Mini-Van.

460 below zero:
ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.)
People in Manitoba start saying..'Cold 'nuff fer ya?'

500 below zero:
Hell freezes over.
All public schools in Manitoba will open 2 hours late.